Good news for anyone who believes in the enduring power of slow-moving reptiles: Jonathan, the world's oldest living land animal, is still very much with us. Despite a particularly cruel internet rumor that spread faster than, well, a tortoise, the nearly 200-year-old giant is just fine.
Turns out, his 'death' was an April Fool's Day prank that got completely out of hand. An X (formerly Twitter) account, hilariously pretending to be Jonathan's actual veterinarian, Joe Hollins, announced the tortoise's demise. The post, naturally, went viral, racking up nearly 2 million views. Because nothing spreads faster than fake news about a beloved, ancient creature.
Poor Dr. Hollins, who, it turns out, doesn't even have an X account, had to jump on Facebook to clarify that he was not, in fact, mourning a patient he'd spent years with. He called the whole thing a "hoax" and a "con" designed to solicit crypto donations. Because apparently that's where we are now: exploiting a venerable tortoise for digital currency.
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Start Your News DetoxJonathan, a Seychelles giant tortoise, holds the Guinness World Record for both the oldest living land animal and the oldest tortoise ever. He's believed to be 193 years old, which means he was already a spry 50-year-old when he arrived on the remote island of St. Helena way back in 1882. For context, Napoleon Bonaparte had already been exiled and died on that very same island six decades before Jonathan even showed up.
He still resides on the lush grounds of the governor's residence, probably oblivious to the internet's brief but intense period of mourning for him. Which, if you think about it, is both impressive and slightly terrifying. Imagine living so long that you outlast multiple global communication revolutions, only to become the subject of a crypto scam. What a life.
